If you give your wife a shopping trip...

If you agree to go to Pier One with your wife,
to return some curtain panels she decided not to like,
she will talk you in to meeting her mom for lunch at Chili's.
On your way there, you will have to pull the pickup over on the highway because she will be worried that the receipt has blown out of the Pier One sack.
And she knows from experience they won't take it back without the receipt.
Once you arrive at Chili's, her mom will give you the awning she had made custom made for your window frame.
On your way out of the restaurant, you will notice a Best Buy, and she will talk you in to buying a receiver for your home audio system.
Then the kids will notice a Halloween Shop, and talk you in to buying them costumes.

Then your wife will realize the Pier One she needed to go to is another 30 minutes away.

So you will have to drive.

You'll hit a big bump and the car will go airborne.

She will realize she needs to use the lady's room.

When you get to Pier One, she will talk you in to getting a big fake tree.
You will take it out to the pickup, and realize that it needs to be covered.

She will tie a couple of Pier One sacks to it and suggest using the awning and you will half-heartedly agree

You will place the receiver on top of it to pin it down.
Then she will tell you she still needs to use the restroom.
You will stop at Target.
Park far away so noone will steal the receiver and the tree.
And let everyone go in and use the facilities.
"Stop stepping on the costumes!  Why are they out of the packages?"

Then head home.
But on the way home, the awning is about to blow out.
Seems the receiver is not holding it down well enough.
She will talk you in to pulling over to fix it.
And get a slushy.  Because she is thirsty.  And why not a lottery ticket?
Lucky you, the lottery ticket is not a winner, so you don't have to stop and cash it in.
Then you will....finally....get home.
Only to realize,
You need to unload a tree.
Install an awning.
Wire a home audio receiver.

And your wife will suggest another shopping trip.
Back to Pier One for some cute stuff she decided she wants.
And if you agree to go to Pier One with your wife....