I need a laundry room keeper

I don't need a housekeeper.

The house is usually fairly kept.

What I need is a laundry room keeper.

This is embarrassing.

She (or he) wouldn't even have to do laundry. 

I do my laundry on Fridays.

This photo was not taken on a Friday.

He (or she) would have to organize this box of wires.

And old remote controls.

And manuals to electronics.

Most of which we don't have anymore.

Don't stick your hand it there.  It might get caught.

And he (or she) would have to stick some stuff in the attic.

Or maybe make a donation.

To the city dump.

Free to good home.  Broken lamp

Oh, forget it.
It would be too much to ask of anyone to sort through this mess.
I'll just shut the door.
Problem solved.