Stuck on Stickers

When I was a child, my sister and I collected Stuck-on-Stickers.

Remember these?

What exactly is a "Fantascene?"  I think it is my new favorite word.

In second grade, I got in trouble at school because someone gave me a sticker and I threw it away.  That is the ultimate diss.  "You think you're my friend?  Well, guess WHAT, SUCKA?  You got another thing coming!  I'm gonna throw away your unicorn sticker.  THAT'S WHAT!  IN YOUR FACE!" 

My teacher found out.  I tried to lie to my teacher but that smart lady figured me out.  I got in trouble but didn't tell my mom.  Unfortunately for me, my teacher told her.

This incident may or may not have corresponded with my parent's divorce, so I will go ahead and blame them for my anger issues and poor decision making.  These problems plague me still.  It is all their fault.

But I digress.

Why do kids not collect stickers anymore?  All the cool kids did it.

But I digress.

I decided I was not happy with my dining room fantascene.  So I painted over the ferns shown here.


And I ordered these wall stickers decals in Medium Gray from Accent Studios . 

Decal = Grown up word for Sticker

When my package arrived, I had a blond moment and called the company to complain that my 60" X 61" sticker decal was clearly not 60" X 61".  I had even measured.  The kind gentleman explained that once I arrange the pieces onto the wall and spread it out, it would be wider.  Then he kindly hung up the phone and no doubt busted out laughing.

For credibility's sake, I think this would be a good time to point out that I have a master's degree. 

I hung up the phone and got depressed because I was going to have to arrange the things onto the wall when CLEARLY I just wanted to stick one giant 60"X61" sticker decal onto my dining room fantascene.  I seriously considered throwing away the sticker, but we all know how that worked out for me in 2nd grade.

So I cut all these pieces out.  Then I followed the directions and used a tool to rub them onto the wall.

I happened to have just the tool in my purse.

Once I got everything arranged onto the wall, I thought it created a lovely fantascene.

"MOM STOP MESSING WITH THE DINING ROOM!"

Another view

The rug also came in and I am awaiting curtains.

If you want to see some really cool bamboo images, just google image WALL DECAL BAMBOO and you will see some amazing fantascenes.

And when I get tired of this I can easily pull it off the wall and....you guessed it...THROW IT IN THE TRASH! THAT'S WHAT!

Under the Sink

Moving into a house that has been vacant and neglected for several months (years?) has it's challenges.  Some parts of the house were easy to clean.  Take these bugs right here:

 Can you spot the spider who is trying to run for his life?

I swept them up into a giant pile, mopped with enough chemicals to contaminate the water supply in surrounding counties, and voila!  Clean!

Other areas are not so simple.  We have 4 sinks in the house and all of the "under sink cabinents looked like this:

Plunger stains?

The obvious solution would be Contact Paper, which was my original plan.  But Marc's Aunt Jane suggested Peel-N-Stick Floor Tiles which can be found at the Dollar Store.  Who knew?

I found an interesting but not extensive selection there (beggars can't be choosers.) 

This is the result:

 Clean and clean-able!

 Very simple project!  Thank you Aunt Jane! 

It's Mario-tastic and Yoshi-riffic!

Look who is sitting next to Yoshi and Mushroom, 

wearing his Mario shirt 

while playing Mario! 

If you are a perfectionist, wallpaper is really not for you.  Look away....

I had to piece the last piece...see how the bricks don't really match here.

You will only notice it if you are a bad boy/girl and you get put in a timeout in the corner.
And it saved me from buying another roll of paper.
My dad suggested that I do it right and order more paper.
Sorry Dad.  I know you love me anyway.
I'll go sit in the corner now.

Here is some additional Mario crap to finish the look.

• A photo of Conrad and Yoshi that I took with my cell phone in the back yard one day when I was laying out and the kids wouldn't leave me alone.  I uploaded in and ordered in B&W from Shutterfly.
• A MarioKart sticker decal that I ordered from eBay.
• A photo of Mario and Conrad that I took at the mall with my cell phone and ordered from Shutterfly.
• A Mario doll action figure that Conrad's Grandmother Suz purchased at said mall.
• A piggy bank to collect money to reimburse me for all the stupid Mario junk I sprang for out of Momma Guilt for moving the kids.

Can wallpaper I ordered today match wallpaper I ordered 2 years ago?

A few years ago, when I was completely frustrated with my ugly kitchen, I had another one of my "brilliant" ideas.  I decided I could wallpaper the laminate/Formica backsplash to create a brick effect.  This was around the time I attempted my m effer project, so I don't think I need to highlight the fact that I was trying to upgrade without spending any money.
I began my search by ordering wallpaper.  I got one roll. 
It said, "Hello, there.  I will make a lovely backsplash."

When wallpaper talks to you,

you might consider seeking professional help.

Then, I began searching online for ways to adhere wallpaper to Formica.

(In case you are curious, I would like to point out that this person did it.  So there.)

But somewhere along the way, I realized I must've been sniffing paint

to have even considered wallpapering Formica,

and I abandoned my project.

Fastforward to Summer 2010.

I am working on Conrad's room.  He wants a "Super Mario Bros" theme.  Most examples of Super Mario rooms are painted in light blue and plastered in Mario/Luigi/Yoshi decals.  I am much too sophisticated for all that nonsense.

So I decided to use the old brick wallpaper!

Then paint a complimentary color (not light blue) above the chair rail.

Good girls use primer when painting over purple.

Good girls use tape.

At least for the bottom and sides.

The top is completely negotiable.

Complete with a Mario Bros plate made by our friend, Mallory.

You know how there is always an issue??????  Why?????
The issue is this:
I only had enough paper to do about 1/4 of the room.  And I didn't know where I had purchased the paper in the first place, being that it was two years ago and I can't even find my car keys or remember my zip code.

So I have just ordered 4 more rolls of what appears to be a similar look from Decorate Today.  I know I didn't order the first roll from here, because they require that you order rolls in pairs, and I only possessed one roll.

Won't you wait by the mailbox with me in anticipation?

The M Effer of All Projects

This project did not involve paint, but it is definitely a project worth sharing! I have seen many a "Sell this House" episode in which metal sheeting was applied to an appliance, giving it an instant face lift and blast into the current century. I was hoping to do the same with this little number circa 1994:I hunted around and ordered some metal sheeting. I think the cost was around $90 a roll, which was pretty inexpensive versus the alternative. Obviously I was looking for a cheap update or I would've just saved myself the trouble and hauled myself up to Sears. Or maybe I was trying to save myself from the CREEPY people that work at Sears here in my small town. Here's the deal - have you ever tried to wallpaper and when you were almost finished, it dawns on you that you are out of paper. Me, being both a tight ass and a "gotta finish what you start" kind of gal, I never wished to order another roll. So I would find myself searching around on the ground for leftover pieces to patch up my remaining wall. This was neither fun nor visually appealing. So how does this relate to metal sheeting? Well, you don't get much for your $90. So you gotta be careful or your fancy new "stainless look" appliance will have a seam running down the middle of it. This is hint #1 to mastering this M Effer Project.
Next, if you decide to stick your oven in a time machine and transport it to the future, I would recommend you wear gloves. As I was trying to cut and measure, and figure out exactly how I was going to maneuver the handles and buttons on my oven and microwave, it dawned on me that this was not going to be as easy as it looks on HGTV. I tend to get tunnel vision, and I was so involved in my cutting and measuring and getting this the hell done so I can enjoy my awesome stainless look appliances, that I didn't realize that I my hands were bleeding from multiple wounds until I saw the blood dripping on my stainless sheeting. Lucky me, the sheeting is pretty washable. That was one positive thing I can say. Anyway, hint #2 is wear gloves when you get after this M Effer Project. Especially if you are squeamish.
Finally, I began to stick the sheeting on the appliances. It is very much like using Contact Paper. There was excessive bubbling. At one point, I even got a needle to begin popping the bubbles to release the air underneath. This technique did not enhance the stainless look. So hint #3 is find a way to not make bubbles in the first place. Sounds easy. But it's not. So good luck solving that issue on your own. If you do figure it out do NOT feel the need to share your hints with me.
Here is how the project is going at this point:
Not bad. See the little "window" in the oven? That wasn't easy. Well, throughout the project, I had growing frustrations, what with my increasing physical pain and the frustration of the seams and bubbles, not to mention my husband and his friend watching from the recliners in the living room (not helping) and laughing at me. I was several hours in at that point and I had to give up on the bubbles. My goal shifted. All I needed to do was trim the sheeting's edges really cleanly so that no one would cut themselves just walking by. So I was working on that, and I'm sure my knife was a little dull at that point. I just could not get it straight, and close enough that it wouldn't be dangerous. And I don't know what compelled me to do the next thing that I did..... most likely a lack of blood flow to the brain...I took my finger....and ran it down....the edge.....to see if it was sharp....and I proceeded to cut myself VERY DEEPLY. Drops of blood began to fall on my white tile and I screamed IT. Yes, I screamed it for my innocent children, my doting husband, my neurotic dog, and the poor friend my husband had invited into our loving home. I yelled, "MOTHER FU@#ER!!!!"

Here is what my oven/micro combo looks like after:
Isn't it pretty? I got it at Sears. From the Creepy Guy. And I just finished paying it off! And I also got a new countertop and backsplash. No blood transfusion required! (But the project cost a little more than I was anticipating.)
My final tip is very simple - just skip this mother and go to Sears.